Happy New Year! We made an effigy of the Old Year and burnt it on the terrace. We danced around it to a 90s soundtrack as the wind blew and for a while I felt like I was 20 again. I stamped on flying sparks in my cheap gold trainers and transitioned from wine to cava to beer like a true amateur. Oh, how fun to be alive! Burn Covid burn!
And then 1st January
arrived with a bang. A bang bang bang as my brain set up a scaffold to repair
the damage. Needless to say I no longer felt in my twenties. The soles of my
shoes had partly melted and the cloying smell of smoke clung to my nostrils
like a roasted bat.
2021 begins with great
intentions. Time to be healthy! Time for fresh air! My husband bought a second hand bike in the
morning to accompany my own oxidized purchase. My bike's called Rusty (it might
not last the year), his is Squeaky (its brakes are tuneful). We took our
toddler out for a ride as the rain clouds gathered. My legs ached as if they
hadn't been used all year. I suppose 2020 was the year of hanging around at
home.
Time to change, now. Yes,
I shall get fit again! I shall meditate and do yoga and write regularly! What a
cliché I am!
Three cheers for all the optimists! In fact I did spend time in my new office
today. Did I embark on a new creative project? Don't be silly! I pushed Sol
around in my office chair for half an hour and said Weee Wee! as her soft owl
was propelled into the air. I could draw parallels with her spinning around in
that chair with my writing career, but best not. It's 2021 and anything can
happen!
My dad always said what matters is making an effort. Cheesy as it sounds, I will be making an effort to live my best life. But unlike in my twenties, when I was desperately impatient to be a famous author and suffered a lot of anxiety... well, today I'm less interested in winning anything, and more interested in accepting my life as it is. Because to be happy with what I have means I can be happy right now. And so with my new year rambling over, let me wish you good health, love and happiness to you and your loved ones.
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