Friday 12 February 2010

Shop Girl and The Date

The Date’s UK Visa has been rejected.
I didn’t cry until I’d got off the phone.
Imagine if you had five days to leave the country.
Five days to close down your whole life.
To pack up your home, cancel the telly, the phone.
To say goodbye to the contacts you’ve worked so hard to get and to the jobs which were finally taking you where you wanted to go.
Imagine five days left with your friends.
Five days left with your girlfriend, except it wouldn’t be five days together because you’d be too busy packing your life up.
Could you do it?
We’ve already taken more than a year to close the shop and we’re still open.
We even fitted a new shutter last week. (Don’t ask, I don’t know.)
The Date has lodged an appeal. At the worst it will buy him time.
Four weeks, I think.
Something gave way inside me when he told me the news.
All those things that had mattered before like getting my own space and finding a new job ceased to be important.
What is independence if you have no control over the big things?
My heart isn’t heavy. My heart is fine.
Life may be uncertain but there is certainty in what I care about.
I feel light because for me there is no dilemma.
If he goes then I’ll follow.
I’ve always preferred happy endings.

10 comments:

green ink said...

As someone who knows what it's like to have your life in the hands of the Home Office, I really hope you get your happy ending, Emily. x

Shop Girl said...

Thanks, that's really nice of you to say. I hope so too! X

Bob Keim said...

5 or 45... It's never enough. But, when being with someone is all it takes to make a happy ending, what could possibly go wrong? Some of us just took a little longer than you to learn that lesson. LOL, like more than twice as long!

bob

葛威 said...

I will never forget saying goodbye at the airport, watching someone leave on a one-way ticket, knowing that their return depends on a simple stamp in passport. Someone we'd never met, who knew nothing more about us than what was written on an application form, had the ability to dictate our future.

But, obstacles aren't insurmountable. Even in the five days ahead of you, you have plenty of options to choose from. Most of them a probably pretty terrifying. Pick one, go for it, and don't let some desk clerk stand in the way.

Shop Girl said...

I feel really moved by your comment. Makes me think how many people really don't have choice and can't come back. But feeling certain you want to be with someone is pretty powerful, it's the stuff of miracles. Oh, I'm getting teary eyed now. X

Date´s Sister said...

You are both on my prayers. Thanks for being there for him. Love u both.

Laura McGowan said...

Oh, best of luck to you both. And at least the most important things will stay constant whatever - writing, the date, your lovely family & friends. XXXX
Ps loved your picture - and then you said that you made it - fantastic! xxx

Shop Girl said...

Thanks Date's Sister - so great to hear from you. I can't wait to meet you!

And thanks Laura, I was quite chuffed with my picture too. Materials: coloured pencils, bits of my 2009 calendar and the Evening Standard.

dreamer said...

Oh dear - I know just how that feels. But should bureaucrats be allowed to stand in the way of love? My answer was no - So I followed her to the other end of the world, and I am happier for it. Whatever happens, best of luck!

Shop Girl said...

Sounds like there are a lot of stories out there! And a lot of adventures to be had too. Thanks for your well wishes. Will keep you posted!
Ps. The Date said I made him look like he was being deported, which isn't the case.