When it
comes to drinking I'm not famous for great self-control. As a teenager I
distinctly remember getting drunk before the party had even begun and spending
the evening talking to the toilet in Spanish. Or was it in an American
accent? I try to forget.
I thought
it would get easier with age, but unfortunately on the cusp of turning thirty,
I still manage to make a fool of myself now and again. Hung over and dull with
regret I inevitably announce that I'll never drink again, a promise
which lasts all of a couple of days.
That's why I'm in awe of Ben
Blackman. He decided to give up alcohol,
not for a week, or a month, but for a WHOLE YEAR... I invited him onto my
blog to find out how he's managing it so far.
How long has it been since you've
given up alcohol?
256 days…hang on a minute…257
days….EXACTLY (as I type this) – not that I’m counting. But I’m ‘only’ doing it
for a year. So ‘only’ 108 to go now and hopefully I’ll go to sleep for a few
hours once I’ve answered your questions so really we’re only talking another
2,586 hours or so after the sleep. 155,160 minutes give or take. I’m not really
counting.
My personal record is 13
days... what has made you persevere?
Well, I said I could do it and when
I say I’ll do something, if I’m in control of it then I’ll do it. Quite
determined I guess – and STUPID! I’ve always said I could give up alcohol, take
it or leave it (which is odd because I used to drink a lot of it) and I said
similar last December. I was waffling on (as I tend to do when I’ve been
drinking) about the fact people give things up for a month these days and think
they deserve a medal. "A month, that’s not commitment, I could do it for a
year," I said to my wife. "That’s a good idea," she said. "Well
not next year," I said. "Because you can’t," she said. And the
rest, is (nearly) history.
Do you even remember your last
hangover?
Um, no actually. But then, I hadn’t
really been get roaringly drunk anymore before I gave up. I’ve got a little
girl. 4 years old. We have no family close by, and from when she was
born, hangovers, I quickly learnt, were not highly feasible. When I get one of
‘those’ hangovers I tend to want to lie in a darkened room for 24 hours. No
noise, no interruptions, maybe just a bit of fast food mid way through (if I
feel up to it). Good luck with that when you’ve got a baby / toddler or bigger
one!
Don’t get me wrong though – I used
to drink with the best of them. I realised that I hadn’t gone a week without
alcohol since I had started drinking (age 15) before this thing – which was a
bit scary! I’m 34 so, you do the math! Since becoming a Dad I just toned it
down a bit. But let’s not pretend I wasn’t knocking back large helpings of wine,
G&T, lager, and the rest, albeit in posher glasses and seemingly more
responsibly whilst sitting in at weekends n all that.
What's the most embarrassing thing
you've ever done whilst drunk?
That I can remember?!
The time I had to be fireman-carried
out of a very full pub (where everybody knew me) age 17. A responsible adult
dropped me off at the front door of my parents house (and promptly scarpered).
My sisters found me crawling across the floor of the hallway. I proceeded to
cut my head open a little bit somehow and my sisters annoyingly got my Mum who
I might have politely (really politely in fact, by all accounts) asked to f-off
more than once. "Mum, will you please just f-off". I’d never use the
f-word in front of my Mum, let alone at
her! I woke up, and you know that thing when you think, good night last
night…oh, what did we do…and then a few seconds later you remember – oh no!
18th Birthday – might
have been sick on a girl. We’ll leave it at that.
The time I was carried out of the
pub over the road from where I lived in my first year at university, still
haunts me too. I was stripped and put to bed by several locals from the pub
plus an array of fellow students (boys and girls) from the halls in which I
lived. Mortified!
I’m SO glad social media didn’t
exist when I was growing up!
What beverage do you miss most? And
what have you substituted it with?
Lately lager. Which is strange
because I didn’t think I liked it that much…which is strange because I must
have drunk thousands of pints of the stuff since teenhood. Before that, wine.
Gin. Rum. All of it really! Substitution wise – nothing. You can’t. I really do
miss the taste and ‘kick’ you get taste wise from alcohol. Nothing can give you
that – they’re too strong a flavour and complex in terms of the way they’re all
made. A couple of weeks ago my wife brought me a non-alcoholic lager. It was
the first time I’ve ever had one and was pleasantly surprised. It was as close
as I’ve come to a replacement. We tried wine the next week – rubbish (like a
posh grape juice) and pear cider the next (even worse).
What changes have you seen in
yourself since giving up alcohol? (Do you feel fitter/younger? Is it worth it?)
Do I feel fitter? Not really. I’ve
started running again recently and that was a lot quicker and easier to get
into after a long break so giving up must be good for you but it hasn’t felt
it. I thought I’d sleep better and wake up raring to go (I’m not a morning
person) but not really.
Do I feel younger? Definitely not.
Maybe the opposite actually. One of the downsides I think to it is that you
never stop thinking. Most people use alcohol to ‘switch off’ to make that break
from the working week to the weekend. To relax after a hard day. That’s a good
thing to do I’ve learnt. It’s difficult to do without alcohol. If I go for a
run instead then that’s good but it stimulates your brain even more so it’s
hard to try and switch off.
That can be good on one hand – eg.
I’m typing my answers for you at 12.35am now (after a fun night out) so – I’m
very efficient! But really – who wants to be efficient at 12.35am on a Saturday
night. Sorry, Sunday morning?
Is it worth it? Well I wanted to see
if I could do it. I knew I could do it, but I also knew I really didn’t want
to, so I was interested to see how hard it was. What would be the benefits? If
you’re weird enough to want to test such things then go for it – but my advice
is – don’t.
I guess it shows I had a healthy
relationship with alcohol that I don’t think I’ve seen any benefits for giving
up. Once I’d got to half way I knew I could do it so I could have ducked out
but then, that wasn’t the challenge was it? I really should have done it as a
sponsored challenge!
Being the only sober person at a
Stag Do is many men's idea of hell, what was your experience like?
I haven’t been on a stag do but I
did go on a ‘lads weekend’. Well I turned up on the Friday night, and they’d
started on Thursday afternoon so that was interesting. That was after 100 days
I think - the first May bank holiday. It was with friends from university days
and beyond. All who know me as a big drinker. They didn’t believe me to start
with but then when they realised I was serious I was very surprised they didn’t
give me any hassle at all. I think they thought I had a problem!
I thought I’d
hate it but I had a great time. One thing I have learnt is that socialising
without drinking is not a problem, in fact it’s probably easier and more fun in
a lot of ways than drinking. I went out with them ‘till 2am, stayed up ‘till
3am singing and dancing. It was great fun. And the next morning I did feel
great compared to all of them so that was a bonus! We went out again on the
Saturday and I drove home at 8pm feeling fresh and fine for the Sunday and
Monday.
For all of us who promise to give up
drinking on Monday and have a glass of wine on Saturday, what are your top 3
tips for staying off the poison?
Don’t bother! Drinking is fun and
quite good for your wellbeing, if you ask me. Unless, of course, you have a
problem with drinking, in which case you probably shouldn’t be seeking my
advice!
If you really want to though – go
for it. Set yourself a target, don’t tell anybody else (people don’t like it
when you say you won’t drink so pressure you more to do it) and see how you get
on.
Also, just
start. There will never be a good time to do it. Don’t do any of that "I’ll
stop once I’ve finished off all the wine in the house..." type business
because that time will never come. I started on New Year's Day – we had loads
of grog left from Christmas which seemed really annoying to have to leave for a
year. A true team player - my wife has done her best to battle through it all!
How long have you got left?
What, right now? 107 days and 23
hours. But I told you, I’m not really counting. MUCH.
